I spent Valentine’s Day 2022 with A in Berkeley.
Come Valentine’s Day 2023, which I’m sure I spent with my family and sister, I probably dreaded it and buried myself in the false hope that she was coming back soon.
I also dreaded Valentine’s Day 2024, and feared she was with someone else.
This year, I have absolutely positively no fears or pain at all. I had no feelings around Valentine’s Day at all, really. Everything in my life is coming together. So many absolutely incredible things have happened. This job, Las Vegas, racing the super cars, receiving my Tudor Black Bay 58, BUYING MY HYUNDAI VELOSTER N. Once I fix my sleep, that will mirror in my life. No anxiety, no fear.
And maybe I needed to reach this level of unaffectedness for the path to be cleared. And that could only happen with time. But its not that it NEEDED to take a long time, but that the growth required time.
Seeing how literally everything in my life either has or is coming together for me, shows me what this will be like too.